Name__________________________________________Date______________________
Reading Comprehension
Volume 4, Number 6, October 12, 1998
www.rhlschool.com
Note: This week's Reference Skills issue, introduces vocabulary for this selection.
Funny Jokes, Part Three
Mr.
El and Mr. Smitty decided that an appropriate response to Miss
Joan’s “joke” would be to remove
something she had put up on her classroom wall. As soon as they were
sure that the coast was clear, they headed for their victim’s
room.
“I must
admit, this is a beautifully decorated room,” Mr. El remarked.
“Don’t
you think it would be a shame to diminish that beauty?” Mr.
Smitty asked, hoping that Mr. El would abandon his mission.
“You’re
right, Mr. Smitty. Just taking things off the wall would be petty,
beneath our professional dignity.” Mr. El’s eyes
were drawn to the alphabet posters that were lined up above the front
chalkboard. “We owe it to Miss Joan to be more
creative,” he announced. “Look up there, over the
front board. There’s a picture of an apple with the word
printed neatly under it, a bee for b, a couch for
c. This presents an opportunity!”
“Look,”
Mr. Smitty said, “She has more letters on that table in the
corner.”
Mr. El quickly
positioned the table beneath the a poster. Mr.
Smitty found some markers, scissors, tape, and construction paper. He
placed them on the table.
“We’ll
just make some subtle changes,” Mr. El said. It might take
days for Miss Joan to realize that anything’s different. Then
she’ll have to wonder how many people noticed and what they
thought!”
“That’s
cruel!” Mr. Smitty protested in mock horror.
Mr. El just
grinned and climbed onto the table. “We won’t have
to change them all, hmm, let’s see, a, b...”
The c poster showed a boy and girl sitting on a
couch, looking at each other. “I’ll just peel this
second c off. Could you please hand me up a g?”
“Now
that ‘couch’ is ‘cough’, what
about the picture?” Mr. Smitty asked.
“Is
there a green marker down there?” Mr. El took the marker that
had been promptly held up, and drew lines coming from the
boy’s mouth to the girl’s face. “There, that’s
a cough,” he said proudly.
They continued
studying the posters. “Check this out,” Mr. Smitty
observed, “Miss Joan used her own face on the f
is for ‘face’ poster.”
Mr. El jumped off
the table, grabbed a red marker, and slid the table under the new
target. In a moment, the pretty round face with the short brown hair
had a new feature: a big red tongue sticking out.
The next to be
modified was the l poster.
“We’ll leave the word
‘lunchbox’ as is,” Mr. El said,
“but I think we’ll alter the appearance of the
lunchbox.” In a flash, he had fashioned a new picture from
construction paper and taped it over the original drawing.
“That’s
not a lunchbox, it’s a toilet!”
Mr. Smitty exclaimed.
“Of
course it’s a lunchbox,” Mr. El responded.
“Just look at the letters, l-u-n-c-h-b-o-x,
lunchbox!”
Suddenly, the m
poster caught Mr. Smitty’s attention.
“Isn’t that a photograph of Mr. Kay?” he
asked.
“Isn’t
that precious!” Mr. El scowled. “A picture of the
principal over the word ‘man’.”
Before Mr. Smitty
could blink, Mr. El was removing the a from the
poster. “Hand me an o, k,
e, and y, please.”
Mr. Smitty smiled.
“Do you think Mr. Kay will like being labeled a monkey? I
thought you --”
“Listen!”
Mr. El interrupted. “I hear footsteps down the hall. And they
sound like Miss Joan footsteps!”
Within seconds,
the table and art materials were put away. As the two men strolled
innocently down the hall, they met Miss Joan.
Miss Joan was in a
very good mood. “Are you two staying for the kindergarten
open house? It starts in just a little over an hour. We’re
even having the cable TV company broadcast it live. Your friend, Miss
Joan, is going to be a famous television star!”
“Infamous
is more like it,” Mr. Smitty groaned.
“I beg
your pardon,” Miss Joan replied.
Mr. El and Mr.
Smitty looked at each other as if to say, “Now what do we
do?”
What
do you think Mr. El and Mr. Smitty should do? What will they do?
It’s
all up to you as you become the author and write the conclusion to this
story.
Copyright 1998 RHL